Happy Halloween!

Halloween is once again creeping around the corner. That means another trip for me back home to offer prayers for the loved ones we have lost and for other souls that have laid to rest.

I couldn't help but remark on how much the observance of this occasion has meliorated. Used to be, 1st-2nd of November was a solemn custom. It was this time of the year when people quitely flock to the cemeteries, carrying bundles of candles and tons of flowers that they offer to the departed. It was also this time of the year when cleaning and repainting the graves of the deceased are usually scheduled. It was also during this time when people prepare food, tuba, tabako, and other favorite grubs of their dead family members infront of the altar. Kids are always told not to touch anything before 6:00PM as souls are believed to visit houses and taste the food at this time.

Way back when I was a little bit younger (which is really not that so long ago.. hehe), it was also this time of the year when I and my childhood friends would scramble around one sari-sari store in our neighborhood and battle on choosing the scariest cartoon mask for only Php1.00. I bet you these were the best halloween costumes kids of those days could proudly own (thanks to the ever reliable rubberbands that hold it in place through our ears). Well of course, we can always ambush our mom's make-ups too. One option we had was to thickly cover our faces with Johnson's baby powder and smudge the reddest lipstick we can find over our lips, cheeks; or if you are a little bit artistic, fake blood tears under your eyes. And if you favor the Dracula character, there was always the plastic fangs as well. Our "attacks" usually happen after dinner time. With candles or flashlights in hand, we would knock from one house to another asking for treats. And from where I grew up, treats equate to the undying biko. At the end of the night, we would happily divide the different varieties of biko among ourselves. Sometimes if we get lucky, we were given budbud or a few Lips candies.

Slowly, people have learned to add twists to this celebration. During All Souls' Day, cemeteries have turned to drinking bars, or casinos, or disco hubs. Prayer murmurs have turned to sounding laughters. Halloween parties have turned to "who-comes-in-the-cutest-attire" party (... since when did a pink fairy or sexy bunny provoke terror??). Trick-or-treaters now come in their complete tailored costumes. Treats have also evolved to skeleton-shaped candles, to pumpkin cupcakes, or other shuddery-looking confections. Malls bewitch us yearly with their decorations, much like Christmas.

Oh well. As long as we don't forget its real essence, it doesn't really matter how we spend this holiday. Paying respect to the dead is a favourable position.

Happy Halloween! ;-)

Their Story Continues...

" ... I want to walk with you to forever. "

Chapter 2: The WALK

She has had so many walks in her life. There is the walk she takes everyday in going to work. There was the walk she teaches her mom when she visits her home. There was the walk she proudly took over the stage during her college graduation. There was the walk on her first communion. Then of course, there was the "baby's first step" walk she had a quarter of a century ago, which she couldn't even find around in her memory.

But if there is one walk she couldn't forget, it is those walks she had with him.

She was hesitant the first time he invited her for a walk. Aside from the fact that she found it an unwise idea to take five kilometers by foot, she was somehow more worried of what could happen along the way. Within seconds, tons of questions started filling her paranoid mind. "What if we will have nothing to talk about? What if he will find me boring? What if my feet get sore and he'll think I am too hammy? What if I'll start sweating a lot? What if...?". But he interrupted her flooded thoughts, "I'd really like to walk with you." And so with one sweet smile and with those wonderful eyes staring right infront of her, she meekly answered, "Yes, of course. Let's go."
Along the way they have learned a lot of each other. It turned out he was a very funny man, while she was a woman of sense. They slowly started emptying their baskets and shared their views on everything round-n'-about the world. They learned of their differences and of things they share the same interest in. He learned he really likes her. And so does she. Before they know it, they have reached their destination. Without tedium. Without sore feet. But yes. With a lot of interesting discoveries of the other. And with a few wipes here and there of their damp bound hands.

Surely it wasn't the last walk they have had. Ultimately, that walk became the paseo for more. For in all the walks thereafter during his visits to her, they have slowly felt That binding Force pulling them close to one another.

Then one fine day and between interlocked fingers, he turned to her and said, "It was really a good idea that we started doing this, don't you think? I love walking with you all the time. . . . . I want to walk with you to forever." She looked at him, planted a deep kiss on his lips, and without saying a word, took his hand again while she gazed into the horizon as they went along to where their feet will take them.

.
.
"Sometimes this Thing scares me. It feels too good to be true. More often than not, I feel It's turning too perfect. What makes It scarier is nothing is perfect. Nothing ever was. What bothers me more is It might come to an end, as all other good things do.

If this is but a dream, I rather not wake up. I shall choose to dwell in my own fairytale. But I am still seeing This... It's all real. It is not just another product of my utterly bizarre imagination. It is all as has been planned.
So I am making myself a promise. While This is what I have now, I shall enjoy It. Live It. Love It. For who knows, It might be the happy ending I am waiting for."



- musings of ms.teacup straight from her new hideout.

When good workers leave the company, check who their bosses are.

I'm starting to hate this project. This tactless, narrow-minded, ambitious, ill-mannered couterpart of mine is getting into my neeeervessss..!! He sees nothing but faults. He does nothing but play crybaby to his superiors. And with these, I and my team appear on the bad slate. Don't get me wrong, I have no problems when I am corrected. Criticisms are always welcome as long as they are humanly and professionally laid out and escalated. But imagine situations like these happening to you...

Situation #1:
Your counterpart asks you how long you can complete one task. You give a reasonable estimate. The reply? "No, that's not possible. We already committed to the customer to finish everthing on this date..." blah blah.

Huh? What's the point of asking my estimate then? And you didn't even ask me first if the timing is feasible before committing to the customer!

Situation #2:
Your counterpart sends you an e-mail asking for your plan/strategy to complete a task on a specified time frame. You responded with a request to inform you whether the plan was sufficient or if it needs to be ironed out. The reply? NONE. Instead, he shows out your plan to his superiors/mentors indicating he totally disagrees with you and asked them to tell you to change the plan totally according to what he wanted.

Double huh?? Why ask me for a plan in the first place if you already have something in mind? It's not even you who will execute the plan! I will!

Situation #3:

You filed for a few days leave. Unexpectedly, a very urgent task came in those days during your absence. Your whole team was not available as this time was a planned 'idle week' for the group, thus everyone was on vacation and no one can perform the task. When you came back to work, you hear some information that your counterpart was very angry why you were absent and because of that, they had to do the task for you.

Ok, refresh me again what planned holidays are for? And I need to ask Mr. Webster what "unexpected" means... just in case I understand it bad.

Situation #4:

It was time to submit all reports. After sending out all the necessary documents, you get a reply from your counterpart asking you why you didn't retest one item. You replied with an evidence, attaching an old mail of his stating there was no need to retest. He replied in defense. You received another question why you didn't test some items in the intermediate softwares. My answer? See Situation #3. It was him who tested it.

Geez...

Now tell me, am I really that bad? Stupid? Or am I just stressed?

Hahay... I want to quit now.

Signed, Sealed, Delivered.

Dear Lola,

It has been years since you left us. And yet the grief I am feeling hasn't changed. I am still somehow haunted by the scene in the cemetery, the part I had to go through in my life that I dread so much. The part of saying goodbye to somebody close to my heart.

It pains me everytime I remember you. It pains me coz I have regrets. Regrets for not being able to spend more time with you when u were still with us. I had been so absorbed with my studies back then, been so pressured with schoolwork that I almost forgot how to live. But please don't get me wrong. I had a lot in mind back then. I was planning to spend more time with you 'one of those days'. I had been thinking of taking you out somewhere where we can eat just the two of us 'one of those days', have a walk in the park 'one of those days', watch sunset by the boulevard 'one of those days', or go to church together. I wanted you to forget about your health condition. I wanted you to become the same old dynamic lola that I see and admire so much before the hospitalization. But none of those were ever fulfilled. Coz time was what I needed and it was what I never got. It was what my college life has stolen away from me. And now I have been hating and blaming myself. I felt I never made any contribution to make you happy even before your last days.

There are nights when I remember our heart-to-heart talks. And I could still clearly recall how you cried the day you received the letter from the mailman. The letter that came from my university congratulating my Mama & Tatay coz I made it in the Dean's List. Those tears of joy I saw in your eyes, the pride, and the advices you gave that day were so powerful. They warmed my heart so much. It gave me back my senses. It became my challenge.

But unfortunately, you weren't there anymore. You didn't wait till my graduation day. You weren't able to see me go up the stage, receive my diploma, and show my biggest smile as the medal was placed on me. Had you been there, I know you would have cried again. And I would have again felt the same warmth I felt before.

If only I could turn back time. I would have done everything I could to show how much I love you. But all I have now are memories of you. Memories of your sweet smile, your caring voice, and most of all, memories of your unconditional love for all of us.

I miss you so much Lola. I know you are up THERE watching over us. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for everything. I know this letter will reach you THERE. I know it. Coz my heart is telling me so.

I love you with all my heart Lola. Till we meet again.


Love,
Your apo

Tick-Tock!

Woof~! September has passed without me ever feeling it. Probably coz I am too occupied with office work lately. Sometimes I really think this project can cause me another trip back to the hospital. Just like my previous project did. Hmm.. gotta learn to relax a little bit. Anyhow,

So it's October. And just as the world is counting down for Christmas, I have a countdown of my own.

Reunion.
Don't you just love this word? Well I do.

--

From grandparents, to titos & titas, to cousins, to in-laws, to the nth degree of relatives.
From college batchmates, to high school allies, to grade school playbuddies.
From long lost friends, to mere acquaintances, to former foes.
From lovers of distant shores, to erstwhile beaus.

...With reunions always come unparalleled excitement and sealed felicity.

So which reunion am I exactly talking about?
You choose.

And what makes mine even more exciting? It comes sooner than Christmas! *winks